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Friday, November 5, 2010

Breaking My Silence On Ke$ha's Poetic Masterpiece "Cannibal"

I've been laying in bed for the past 24 hours, shivering in utter joy, over the poetry of Ke$ha's title track from upcoming mini album Cannibal (out November 22). But now, chyldryn, I've emerged from my chambers to praise The New Queen Of Soul.

At first I wasn't really sure $ would ever again replicate the poetic heights of "Sleazy"—every word, a blessed flower—and I feared the other tracks on the release would be anticlimactic.

BUT NO!!!!! Her newest sacred canticle makes all other "artists" seem like shiftless amateurs. Prose like the following should be taught in halls of literature, the entire globe over:

I think you're hot, I think you're cool
You're the kinda guy I'd stalk in school
But now that I'm famous you're up my anus
I'm gonna eat you, fool!




Susan Boyle and Beyonce, commence with cutting your tongues out with rusty hedge clippers! You've been forever shamed by The Poete$s!

And now I'll just sit here rocking back and forth, silently giggling into the night, playing "Cannibal" again and again and again and again and....