Harp-Playing Slut Joanna Newsom Trashes Lady Gaga, Calls Madonna "A Dumb-Ass"

Obnoxious-voiced hag Joanna Newsom is the latest artist (read: slut with a flop album and a harp) to trash Lady Gaga in the Guardian. (Did you catch Grace Jones' barbed comments last month?) But in the process, she also calls Madonna "a dumb-ass" and cheapens the legacy of soul legends the Spice Girls.

Witness the blasphemy, pop chyldren:

"I'm mystified by the laziness of people looking at how [Lady Gaga] presents herself, and somehow assuming that implies there's a high level of intelligence in the songwriting. Her approach to image is really interesting, but you listen to the music, and you just hear glow sticks. Smart outlets for musical journalism give her all this credit, like she's the new Madonna …" She breaks off and laughs. "Although I'm coming from a perspective of also thinking Madonna is not great at all. I'm like, fair enough: she is the new Madonna, but Madonna's a dumb-ass!"

Later, she emails to clarify what she describes as her "late-afternoon dopiness" on this subject: "I may have contradicted myself. My problem isn't actually with Lady Gaga. But there's not much in her music to distinguish it from other glossy, formulaic pop. She just happens to wear slightly weirder outfits than Britney Spears. But they're not that weird – they're mostly just skimpy. She's fully marketing her body/sexuality; she's just doing it while wearing, like, a 'fierce' telephone hair-hat. Her sexuality has no scuzziness, no frank raunchiness, in the way that, say, Peaches, or even Grace Jones, have – she's Arty Spice! And, meanwhile, she seems to take herself so oddly seriously, the way she talks about her music in the third person, like she's Brecht or something. She just makes me miss Cyndi Lauper." And on the subject of Madonna: "I shouldn't have called Madonna a dumb-ass. Her music and she have just gotten so boring to me, this last decade. I think maybe she doesn't hold her money very gracefully, the way some people can't hold their drink. But one thing she is surely not is dumb."

Mind you, this all from the broad who's fucking the guy who sings "I'm On A Boat." Also, bitch—nobody trashes Madonna but me.

Hey—speaking of which...

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