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Thursday, April 9, 2009

For Every Good, There Is Pure Suck... Hence, The Black Eyed Peas

There are moments when thoughts of relentless violence flood my mind. Thoughts of rage paired with waves of fist-clenching anger. Glass- smashing, skin-ripping mania and gore.

Most of the time this is brought on by a dumb-as-fuck Black Eyed Peas song. (Not to be confused with all the deep, meaningful Black Eyed Peas songs.)

In fact, someone should take that ugly fucker from The Fray, duct tape his face to Will.I.Am's crotch and his hands to Fergie's hump bucket, then kick the three of them into a swimming pool full of Pirhana.



But only when she's singing "Boom Boom Pow." If Fergie's singing "Glamorous," she can live. 'Cause that's a damn fine jam.

The U.S. Top 10:

1. "Boom Boom Pow" - The Black Eyed Peas *1 week*
2. "Poker Face" - Lady GaGa
3. "Right Round" - Flo Rida feat. Kesha
4. "Kiss Me Thru The Phone" - Souljah Boy Tell 'Em feat. Sammie
5. "Blame It" - Jamie Foxx feat. T-Pain
6. "Dead And Gone" - T.I. feat. Justin Timberlake
7. "Day 'N' Nite" - Kid Cudi
8. "Gives You Hell" - The All-American Rejects
9. "You Found Me" - The Fray
10. "The Climb" - Miley Cyrus