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Sunday, November 2, 2008

If Simon Cowell Wants To Be A Real 'Hero', He Should Put On A Cape And Jump Off A Cliff

Oh, now, what a crying shame; Girls Aloud were only, uh, allowed one week atop the U.K. singles chart with "The Promise." Awww. But at least worthy, revered rock legends the X Factor Finalists were the ones to bump the Girls off, with their face-melting power jam "Hero."

Gosh, the guitar solo alone in that one gets me stiff. Plus, it's for a worthy cause; further ensuring Simon Cowell will be raping "talent" for at least four more seasons.

Speaking of shit television at its finest, I actually kind of like Leon Jackson's "Don't Call This Love"...so naturally it's a flop, falling to #20 in its third week.

Meanwhile, have you heard this godawful new Bond theme from Alicia Keys and Jack White (#10)? Lily Allen barfing into a shopping cart probably has more melody. I'm just gonna call it "Another Way To Suck."

Kudos to The Saturdays for hanging in there with "Up," which since its debut two weeks ago at #5, has only slid two positions to #7.

Unfortunately the Saturdays' album Chasing Cars—pretty superb for a debut, when it had the chance to be so, so bad—debuts this week on the Brit album chart at #11. Not that great, but maybe the single will hang in there and draw more attention to the full LP.

Yeah, and maybe I'll go thumb myself now.

The U.K. Top 10:

1. "Hero" - X Factor Finalists *1 week*
2. "The Promise" - Girls Aloud
3. "So What" - Pink
4.
"Infinity 2008" - Guru Josh Project
5. "Sex On Fire" - Kings Of Leon
6. "Hot N Cold" - Katy Perry
7. "Up'" - The Saturdays
8. "Love Lockdown" - Kanye West
9. "Wire To Wire'" - Razorlight
10. "Another Way To Die" - Alicia Keys & Jack White